I just look really local, I guess
|German tourist:||Excuse me, are you familiar with the trains?|
|Me:||I'm sorry, no, I'm just visiting.|
|German tourist:||Okay. Can you tell me whether the B train runs on weekends, and where I can find it?|
|Me:||...no, I can't, I'm sorry.|
|German tourist:||I'm just trying to find the B train.|
|Me:||Yes, I gathered that.|
Epic vocal trance
I haven’t had a chance to make a mix lately, and unfortunately, I don’t expect to any time soon. But in lieu of that, I’d like to start hitting you with a few old standbys that always keep my headphones at full volume.
Today, let’s kick it off with some massive vocal trance tracks spanning the better part of the last decade.
Rachel Shteir, Chicago is too good for you; please leave
I simply have no idea what author (and, bafflingly, apparent Chicago resident) Rachel Shteir’s purpose was, apart from bending some facts and making up others to present an argument that Chicago is an utterly hopeless, worthless city in the unstoppable throes of decline. “So Chicago is not Detroit, not yet,” she writes. (Let’s put aside the sucker-punch of Detroit for a moment.) “But the city is trapped by its location, its past, and what philosophers would have called its facticity — its limitations, given the circumstances.”
Given that you’ve left no wiggle room for debate, no silver lining, and no apparent intention to be told otherwise, Rachel Shteir, can I recommend you leave my city? Why are you here, anyway?
Shteir pretends to review a series of three books on the politics, culture, and nuance of Chicago to scheme her way onto Page 1 of the NYT’s Sunday Book Review, but make no mistake: she’s not here to tell you about Neil Steinberg’s You Were Never in Chicago. She’s here to tell you about our “abominable weather” made more tolerable “thanks to global warming.” (How she’s missed spring, summer, and fall here for her 13 years allegedly calling Chicago home, I don’t know.) She’s here to trumpet our murder rate, never mind that New York City’s murder epidemic in the 80s and 90s has vanished and left a shining monument of a world-class metropolis in its place. She’s here to tell you about “Crook County,” a term I’ve never once heard in my decade here.
Of course, as Gapers Block rightly notes, Shteir predicted that Rahm Emanuel would never be elected mayor “because the city won’t elect a Jew,” so I’m not putting much weight in this tripe that the fast-asleep editors of the Review let slip through.
Rachel, it’s not Chicago that’s hopeless, it’s you. Please leave, and make a little room for the great people of Chicago and its visitors who know how to appreciate what a wonderful place we’ve built.